Submissive Enlightenment

by Christopher Lovejoy on February 17, 2019

I must confess from the outset that I really, really like the word “submissive.”

Wait, don’t go just yet, because I know what you’re thinking: “Submissive? Submissive? This isn’t about being sexually dominated, is it?” Well, yes and no, but mostly not, considering how vast the subject surrounding submission, which need not ever be associated with humiliation.

I mean, try these on for size: awakened submission; enlightened submission; empowered submission. Okay, by now you’re probably having a serious WTF moment, perhaps even wondering if I’ve lost my noodle, but I can assure you, there is some serious gold to be mined here.

Especially when you take the word “submissive” and tack it onto the word “enlightenment.” Submissive enlightenment: don’t you just love the sound of that? I know I do, and by the time you finish reading this post, perhaps you will, too. But then again, maybe not, but that’s okay.

At least you’ll be privy to a new and fresh perspective on enlightenment.

And submission, too. And here we’re talking delicious submission.


Back in the day, when humans lived in tribes, the central figure ~ the alpha male ~ held the group together like a pole star with his own unique brand of discipline, making sure that the genes most fit for survival got passed along to succeeding generations. The females most favored by him were young, attractive, vital, and fit. The beta males most likely to take down a weak and/or aging alpha or battle it out in the event of an alpha death were strong, fit, quick, and deadly. In such an environment, beta and delta males and females could afford to be submissive.

In today’s world, this template for survival is still with us, albeit in a more refined form. When we attend a meeting, a party, or a concert, for example, we are naturally wired to instinctively sense who’s on top, who’s playing second fiddle, and who’s playing a supporting role.

Today, submissive goes hand in hand with supportive, but what if the submissives among us, sensitive to the ways of inquiry and advocacy, and not having to pay so much attention to survival and security, could assume more dominant postures in the affairs of human culture?

Might the tenor of this world, with its constrictive, destructive emphasis on domination and control, not shift in favor of a more humane way of being for one and all? Might submission, as a posture of being, not assume a more awakened, enlightened, and empowered connotation?

I’m not suggesting that we ignore, bypass, or deny human nature. That would be stupid. What I am suggesting is that we work with what we have to modify our ways of being and doing and having, while appreciating the fact that we’ve come a long way since the days of old.

Well, at least on the surface we have … nudge, nudge, wink, wink.


In my previous post, I made a statement that likely raised more than a few pairs of eyebrows, reproduced here for ease of reference: you never ever choose x; x always always chooses you.

Now if you’re thinking that only a submissive could make such a statement, you might be right, but as one who delights in being what I call “submissive transmissive,” I wasn’t trying to be provocative.

Really I wasn’t.

Sophisticated brain scans clearly indicate that choices are made fractions of a second before they’re conscious. I invite you to sit with this seemingly insignificant fact for a moment and ponder it deeply …

So does this mean we have no free will? Not at all, and here’s why: we know, at least on some level, what it means to assume an awakened, enlightened, empowered, submissive, transmissive point of view. This is our gift. This is our saving grace. This is our ticket to freedom.

Relax and realize: all of our choices have already been made, are already being made; all we need to do is be an effective steward of choice, allowing all of our choices to come up for processing while going with the flow of those choices that mean the most and resonate best.

This is the true meaning of being submissive, transmissive.


Did you hear about the experiments where scientists isolate a rat inside a cage with one of two tubular options: one connected to a bottle of water and another connected to a bottle of water laced with an addictive drug? I bet you can guess what happened to these hapless rats.

They got so high on the drug that they killed themselves in the process.

These rats submitted themselves to circumstances that seemed utterly hopeless and did what any natural, normal, healthy rat would do: used what was available to expedite an escape from the grinding, gnawing emptiness that arose in the midst of a rather impossible situation.

In the aftermath, one scientist got the bright idea to create an enriched environment (a heaven for rats, if you will, where rats could maintain regular contact with other rats with all sorts of toys), including the same two bottles of water as before. Can you guess what happened?

Bingo! No addictions!

The rats stayed true to their nature, avoiding the drug-laced water like the plague, not unlike the Vietnam soldiers who returned home to safer, richer environments, dropping their drug addictions like hot potatoes. The point: having plenty of meaningful options circumvents addiction.

More to the point: being submissive transmissive is a breeze in environments rich with promise and possibility. Of course, you already knew that, right dear reader? Of course you did. Of course you did.

Perhaps now the current epidemics of loneliness, suicide, opioid addiction, and the compulsive use of smartphones make a little more sense, but then again, maybe not, given the growing cult(ure) of functional narcissism with its rising levels of self-absorption and self-entitlement.

Just sayin’.


You’re at a party, and suddenly the hostess (the alpha female in charge) declares you can go to a club, strip down to your underwear, and watch some nude mud wrestling or you can go to a retreat center, change into a white robe, and practice being present with a partner.

While she’s going on and on about the merits of each, you’ve likely already (a) made a choice; (b) realized you’re on the fence (both sound good to you); or (c) gone into resistance, wondering how she could spoil your evening (in your mind at least) with such a shitty choice.

In all cases, you realize (submissively) you are simply not in control of this situation.

You simply have no choice but to accept the response given below consciousness.

What to do? Wrong question. Better question: who to be to become, right … now?

Who … to be … to become?

The great thing about being submissive transmissive is that you are always at liberty to choose your state of being, all the better if you’ve conditioned your mind not to take its cues from circumstances, as circumstances are, rich or poor, current reflections of past choices.

Being the incurable dreamer, lover, and painter of life and love that you are, you have ready access to a palette of options from which to choose: peace, love, joy, bliss, grace, ease, awe, wonder, …

Here’s what a portion of my palette looks like …

at peace
with grace and ease
in awe and wonder
by way of bliss
through love and joy,
i submit and surrender
to serenity with sincerity;
else, i play the game
of equanimity

Any one of these states can be profitably tapped and tuned; feel free to use them all to construct your own palette. In choosing to be who you see yourself becoming, allow your awakened doing to be informed and inspired by your enlightened, empowered states of being to becoming.


Suppose, just suppose, you feel trapped in circumstances beyond your control.

Given what you’ve read so far, can you imagine what you might do to break through? The answer is simple: nothing. You would do nothing, except maybe practice the fine art of doing nothing, putting the emphasis of your life on being … and becoming (to wit: see above).

What does your palette look like? Is it colorful? Or is it just black and white? Which is fine, if what you’re doing is exploring the limits of black and white, what with its many and various shades of gray. If colorful, do you have lots of colors or only a few? Many hues or just a few?

It’s up to you … Or is it?

Truly, wouldn’t be nice if, from an environment rich with color, we could consciously restrict the use of color to explore limits, rather than be compelled to operate within restrictions imposed from without? Would this world not be a healthier, happier place? Of course it would.

The point being: why make it so hard to offer palettes rich with color in environments rich with options while expecting anything other than cars on the road that are mostly black, white, silver, and gray and people on sidewalks who wear clothes that are mostly black, white, and gray?

Any ideas?

I’m dying to hear them.


And now for the juicy stuff, which I offer as a fictional portrayal …

This split-second choice is made for me: go to the retreat center. And so I go … and I end up finding the love of my life … but not before having the time of my life. You see, being wholly and fully present with a partner was just warm-up for something far more … umm … dangerous.

No instructions were given save the one simple instruction that had us put on devices that immersed us fully in simulated environments where … I swear, you’re not going to believe this … where the environments took their cues directly from you and your intentions and inspirations.

Forget about rapid manifestation; this was ordination at the highest level.

The more attuned I became to my own creation, the more subtle my attunement became, the more dangerous the becoming, and the more terrified I felt at losing control of my thoughts and feelings, urges and impulses … be at peace with grace and ease in awe and wonder …

Oh yeah.

No sudden moves from this explorer extraordinaire.

At one point, I couldn’t stand it anymore. I just had to get out.

When I came out, I could not help but breathe a sigh of relief. I had had enough of being submissive transmissive for one day. Actually, the whole experience lasted only a few minutes in real time, but it felt like a whole day had passed. No one could get past five minutes.

Thank God for “slow and steady wins the race.”

The love of my life is in full agreement with me.

Hmm, what if we go to the nude mud wrestling?

Just what surprises could arise from the mud?

Really, it’s all about coming and staying alive to lovelust … submissively, transmissively, imaginatively, creatively, productively, naturally, spontaneously, effortlessly, beautifully, harmoniously, prosperously, intimately, deliciously, divinely, exquisitely, ecstatically … need I say more?


A preview of my published work can be found here.

An outline of my masterwork in progress can be found here.

A listing of my posts on this site can be found here.

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