they say that energy flows
where attention goes,
but how do I meet and greet myself
in each and every moment?
do I let it be, open and curious,
by being receptive and responsive?
or do I make it so, pay it forward,
decisively and effectively, as I go?
no matter where I care to go,
no matter where I care to be,
can I not see that each moment
is pregnant with possibility?
and yet, can I not also see
that be here now is no reprieve,
where no moment is as discrete
as I would have myself believe?
and when I focus the mind,
I cannot help but wonder:
do I not leave myself behind
as if to cut the Self asunder?
and so, I am left to ponder:
why not just flow and grow with ease,
to free myself to go yonder,
to be and do and have as I please?
This morning, at my local library, I picked up a copy of Tantra: The Supreme Understanding, by Osho.
Just moments ago, I savored the wisdom of Osho as I read the very first paragraph in the introduction entitled The First Thing is the Body, which I am pleased to share with you now:
Tantra trusts in your body.
Tantra trusts in your senses.
Tantra trusts in your energy.
Tantra trusts in you – in toto.Tantra does not deny anything
but transforms everything . . .
Trust is key: a warm trust, a trust that is kind and gentle, a trust that can express as amused or bemused.
I trust my body to keep me alive and well; I trust my senses to guide the course of my body through the mind, heart, soul, and spirit; I trust my energy to know when to rest and when to flow; and I trust myself totally as and when I care enough to explore and express the True Self.
To the extent that I am ready, willing, and able, I deny no thing in a bid to accept and confirm all things, to allow all things to transform. The main qualifier here, of course, is “to the extent that I am ready, willing, and able”. For many, for far too many, a deep wounding has occurred, in one way or another, at one time or another. The wounds vary in their depth of hurt, in their breadth of harm, in their source (in the womb, at birth, in the fight for life that can only be described as a Draconian struggle for survival of the fittest), but their underlying message remains the same throughout:
Dear God:
you have betrayed me,
and in this betrayal,
you have abandoned me;
I can no longer trust you,
and because I can no longer trust,
I can no longer be true.
This terrifying message resounds through the ages, a terrifyingly potent message that also speaks to the individual “you” of privilege and to the collective “you” of class, gender, and race, a message that, if allowed a fair hearing across the globe, would speak volumes to the majority of people on this planet, even as it serves up a reminder to the more awakened ones among us to be especially tolerant, compassionate, and merciful – even in the face of violence or aggression.
In light of this brief exposure to the chilly, chilling Wound of Separation, one might be tempted unthinkingly to assume that a lucky few, whose wounds are presumed to be few and far between, are leaving the rest of us behind, but I would caution against such a supposition. Rather, I would suppose that everyone is adversely affected by all manner of lack and loss, by the cutting hurts and the countless harms, by the many traumas and their ensuing dramas, if only indirectly, for having dared to be born in this world, in a world where suffering is par for the course.
The underlying Doctrine of Scarcity that plagues this world, however, for keeping global population in check and for separating (eugenics-like) the wheat from the chaff, need not prevail; a full disclosure of what is truly happening in this world need not be buried under a mountain of lies.
We all seem to be such good actors, but in the light of Presence, it is not too hard to see and hear and feel just how far we have fallen into the depths of our pride and pretense, and in spite of our meager attempts to bypass the core issues, we have all yet to recover from the Wound:
the Inner Child points to a True Self,
but the Wound takes a fearsome toll,
compelling the Child to go into hiding,
and what comes out is a False Self,
without satisfaction deep and true
it is said: a return to innocence is possible,
to experience just how good it feels to be true
to yourself and to safe and significant others,
as well as the Source of your understanding,
by way of prayer or meditation, in a group setting,
or alone, with a tree, a journal, or a blue sky
to those who feel they have been wounded:
beware sharing your true self (at least at first)
with those whom you perceive as being unsafe
(we’re perfectly safe; we just don’t know it yet),
and follow this process to heal the Child within:
1) practice being real and true with safe others
2) discover what you need to be healthy and happy
3) grieve the ungrieved hurts, traumas, and losses, and
4) create a safe space to allow the Inner Child to heal
Reference: Healing the Child Within
Five years ago to this very day, I published Let it be? Make it so?. Truth be told, today, my future self (relative to my past self) is stunned and staggered by the fact that I was able to write and convey this wisdom so long ago (to me, as of now, five years feels more like five decades).
Near the end of this post, I wrote, and I quote:
Here are my ground rules:
cultivate presence, welcome peace;
cultivate promise, welcome love;
cultivate purpose, welcome passion;
and be a wizard
with the possibilities that arise for you.
In the light of this declaration of power, which wends and weaves its way around and through the roots of presence, peace, and promise, I can easily read this mantra with an evergreen interest: with presence, I have peace; at peace, I find my promise; in promise, I feel my power.
Near the end of my most recent post, I posed this question to highlight a vital distinction: I have need of promise to feel my power and I have need of power to find my purpose, but do I feed my purpose with promise (soulfully) or do I feed my purpose with power (spiritually)?
One might be tempted to answer “both”, but as I shared in my most recent post, this is not a question that is easy to answer. Supposing that I declare that my purpose in life is “to grow and to help others to grow”, one might rejoin, “yes, but … grow how?” And I answer: “to grow in my capacity to set aside conscience to gain as much as I can for myself, even if this means surreptitiously doing so at the expense of others.”
In this light, in playing the role of a sociopathic, Machiavellian narcissist, I feed my purpose with the promise to have as much as I can for myself, even as I feed my purpose with the power to get as much as I can for myself. I grow in my capacity to have and get as much as I can, even as I help certain others (those with whom I identify as worthy and competent) to have and get as much as they can for themselves.
As the Law of One makes clear: as long as I aim to serve myself at least 95% of the time, I am sure to be sufficiently polarized to evolve and ascend in exclusive service to me, myself, and I.
On the other hand, suppose that I declare that my purpose in life is “to love myself and others in the light of wisdom and to help others to love themselves and others in the light of wisdom”. Again, this can be twisted in Service to Self: “to love myself and certain others selfishly and exclusively in the light of any wisdom that would give us the power and the freedom to gain and to keep it all for us and us alone”.
If anything perceived as positive can be twisted to serve a negative agenda, then, by the same token, perhaps anything perceived as negative can be transformed to serve a positive purpose.
Consider this: “who cares what others think? If you’re truly happy with the choices you’ve made, then whose business is that but your own? Just think of how much you could acquire and achieve if you could just stop letting the feelings, behaviors, and opinions of others to dictate the way you live your life.”
Here, the Wound of Separation speaks loud and clear, negatively and persuasively, but let us for a moment transform these protestations by infusing them with a positively loving and trusting vibe:
care deeply about what others think by what they say,
in response to what they say and do in relation to youif you feel any negative emotional charge in response,
find it within yourself to release it and relieve yourself
As a man in touch with his inner child, I have come to expect in my encounters with women that many if not most will broadcast a vibe of fear and mistrust coupled with a strong sense of entitlement (as needed), and if by chance I should encounter a woman who has retained a good measure of her femininity coupled with a loving, trusting vibe, I cannot help but be surprised and delighted, and so, with the infusion articulated above, I can remain open to being receptive and responsive to those rare creatures of love and light who radiate their love and light in spite of themselves, even as I remain ready, willing, and able to deftly penetrate with subtlety the shields of entitlement of those who, because of their social conditioning (in no small part because of socially engineered mass media controls in place to curb population growth), cannot help but insist on being submissive, compulsive, offensive, defensive, or passive-aggressive in their mistrust. I stand ready to be treated like a loser or a villain or a monster or (perish the thought) “a potential rapist” even as I stand willing and able to extend a modicum of warmth and charm with an attitude of gratitude as a modest attempt to soften the energetic shield of fear and mistrust and to weaken the poise of those who would stand guard with a sword. I care deeply about what women think by what they say and how they say it, in response to the vibe that infects (or better yet, infuses) what they say and do in relation to me, and if I should happen to feel any negative emotional charge in response, I can be ready, willing, and able to find it within myself to release it and relieve myself of any potential burden, and in that fleeting moment find that I no longer bear the glistening, gaping Wound.
In light of this example, and in light of a global transition rushing headlong towards greater transparency, consider this ready-made purpose in life: “to be ready, willing, and able to bring love and light to anyone (anywhere, at anytime, for any reason) who would presume to broadcast a vibe of fear and mistrust, and do this ‘bringing of the light’ with a carefully modulated passion coupled with compassion devoid of idiocy.” As a lightbringer, I remain fluid and flexible, wending and weaving my way effortlessly and enjoyably through encounters hot and cold, hard and soft, cool and warm, dense and light.
With such a purpose in my life, the meaning of my life is clear: to help others prepare for a full disclosure of what awaits us all. Aside: there are those who know without a doubt that it is not humanity’s destiny to wither away inside the clutches of Earth’s cycles of life and extinction. Rather, we are called to venture forth, beyond our terrestrial origins, to establish thriving civilizations throughout the cosmos. Unbeknownst to many, some have already realized this vision secretly, while others have been relegated to the use of technology that depends on a downward spiral of dwindling resources. A conflict now rages over whether to preserve these advancements for the ranks of a global elite or to share this destiny with the whole of humanity and usher in a new era of peaceful conscious advancement.
In my next post, join me, if you dare, as I begin to share inklings of the meaning of my life in full bloom.
Note: my evolving outline on approaching a realization of the ultimate in personal fulfillment can be found here, accessible from the nav menu under the page “Be Here Now”.
Next: Ultimate Outline 07
Note: this ever growing perspective began here: Ultimate Perspective