Ultimate Fulfillment 26

by Christopher Lovejoy on October 5, 2014

Consider this idea for a post (article, essay, book, video, skit, play, show):

On How to Do Everything Right, with Presence, in Harmony with Pretense

Focus on being of service to others, restrict “making a difference in this world” to this focus, while (a) wearing the vest of your expectations lightly and (b) being compassionate in your intent.

This prescription for greatness, at least for those at a certain level of maturity whose energetic signature is tuned to “helping and serving”, is the cosmic ideal in the grand scheme of things, but what if your energetic signature is attuned to receiving, reflecting, and responding in service to exploring, expanding, and expressing, as a means to loving, trusting, and serving yourself?

In contrast to the energy of abandonment (a valid, soulful, heartfelt energy – see above), what if you feel more comfortable with the energy of entitlement (referenced in the question above)?

I’m willing to assume that many if not most of us feel that we need to be in control of at least one aspect of our lives and that many if not most feel that we want to be in control of yet another.

For example, I presently feel that I need to stay in control of the financial aspect of my life, even as I presently feel that I want to stay in control of the creative, vocational aspects of my life.

I could soften the vibe of needing by declaring, “I allow myself to be in full control of my finances”, but the fact remains: I need to stay in control of how (and how much) I earn, spend, and save.

I could strengthen the vibe of wanting by declaring, “I insist that I be in full control of my creativity”, but the feeling persists: I want to stay in control of how I express myself creatively.

Many people share this need (to have a constructive relationship with money) and want (to have a productive relationship with creativity), even if they would never admit it to themselves or others.

As I see it, what I need and what I want are absolutely integral to soul and spirit, respectively. If need is not satisfied, the soul is not satisfied, and if want is not fulfilled, the spirit cannot be fulfilled.

For the spirit to act in harmony with soul, needs must be identified and satisfied so that desires can be expressed and fulfilled. To satisfy what is required bodes well for fulfilling what is desired.

In serving maturely and decisively as mediator between need and want, soul and spirit, the ego is positioned to harmonize. If the ego serves to relate to the heart of the soul by way of the Witness, the ego also serves to connect with the soul of the spirit by way of the Will.

Allowance (letting it be) and insistence (making it so) are two vital energies that the ego can draw on and channel so as to activate soul and spirit by way of the Witness and Will, respectively.

With this background in mind, I’d now like to offer a context for attending to the ways in which the cosmic field of play can be interpreted and utilized for an active True Self with a mature or maturing ego at its core. In the process of doing so, I hope to provide a basis upon which to approach the realization of the ultimate in personal fulfillment.

In my recent post, I presented my latest incarnation of the cosmic field of play upon which a True Self can be placed, which features a whitespace characterized by seven divine attributes. In that post, I examined the energies of egoic abandonment and egoic entitlement, of allowance (for the heart of soul) and insistence (for the soul of spirit), but what sort of presence is required to negotiate (soundly) and navigate (sanely) the projections of pretense, of pretentious behavior and conduct?

In a TED talk given by Julian Treasure on how to speak in ways that would have others willing to listen, he conjures an acronym that captures, for him, the essence of what is required for optimal communication. He uses the acronym HAIL, drawing on an ancient roman definition (to wit: expressing greeting or acclaim; e.g., “Hail, Caesar!”). Greetings generally set the tone for the course and character of a conversation or a discussion, and HAIL is no different: “Hail, Christopher!”

H onesty
A uthenticity
I ntegrity
L ove

I would, however, add this piece:

S incerity

I must admit, however, that something about this does not feel right to me. True, HAILS is a good way to remember what is germane to optimal communication, but the qualities captured by HAILS is imprecise and lacks an order that satisfies the heart of my soul.

In keeping with a justifiable objective philosophical order – real, true, good, right, pure – I present, for the sake of Presence, the following qualities of character, in this particular order:


Authenticity (being present to what is real), sincerity (being present to what is true), honesty (being present to what is good), integrity (being present to what is right), and purity (being present to what is pure), stand in contrast to all that is pretentious: inauthentic, insincere, dishonest, devious, and … well, a whole lot of words  (corrupted, depraved, polluted, to name a few) could be used here to denote what is not pure and what is not wholesome and what is not genuine.

Indeed, purity could very well represent a culmination of sorts – the ultimate peak of character – in which authenticity, sincerity, honesty, and integrity have become second nature, and with justification and purification under your belt, sanctification would not be far behind.

But I digress.

If the primary focus of most everyone on this planet were to suddenly shift to being authentic, sincere, honest, and integrous, the world would (seemingly, miraculously) transform overnight.

But this is not the kind of world in which we live (yet).

Pretense in this world is ubiquitous, and in my view, ought not to be judged (necessarily and summarily) as bad or wrong. In a corrupt and corrupting world such as ours, pretense has a certain cachet, especially for the educated and sophisticated among us. The more present we can be to all manner of pretense (light, gray, dark), the more quickly and easily we can come to terms with this less than pleasant truth.

With presence, we can match up, in a one-to-one correspondence, these conditions …

energetic (body)
clear (mind)
buoyant (heart)
vital (spirit)
serene (soul)

… with these moral qualities …

authentic (in service to what is real)
sincere (in service to what is true)
honest (in service to what is good)
integrous (in service to what is right)
genuine (in service to what is pure)

… such that the conditions of being energetic, clear, buoyant, vital, and serene make it that much easier and more enjoyable to be (and stay) authentic, sincere, honest, integrous, and genuine.

For example, you need to be clear to be sincere (to remain in service to what is true).

… and such that the qualities of being authentic, sincere, honest, integrous, and genuine make it that much easier and more enjoyable to be (and stay) energetic, clear, buoyant, vital, and serene.

For example, you need to be honest (to be in service to what is good) to stay buoyant.

Certainly, we can pretend to project any one of these conditions in a soulful, heartfelt, sacred encounter, and we can pretend to project any one of these qualities when having a spiritual, mindful, divine experience, but to remain wholly present to both encounter and experience, we would do well to stay aligned with what is desired (spiritually) even as we remain attuned to what is required (soulfully).

This is no easy feat, which is why I intend to spend a lot of time and energy exploring in depth, in posts to come, the cosmic field of play.

Next: Ultimate Fulfillment 27

Note: this ever growing perspective began here: Ultimate Perspective


The Ultimate
Personal Fulfillment


a message for our times: “be true, be wise, be free; love is the key”




(Setting the context)


The syntactical nature of reality, the real secret of magic,
is that the world is made of words, and if you know the words that the world is made of,
you can make of it whatever you wish ~ Terence McKenna

consider this truth: “there is no truth”: true or false? if true, then false; if false, then true

words are powerful, as and when they are spoken in the light of truth, love, and wisdom




(A cosmic perspective)

First installment: the cosmic life review (learn more)
Second installment: a cosmic perspective on birth, life, and death

Current study: fate, birth, life, death, and destiny in context

View this page to explore the basic issues




The ethical imperative: guard guide your eyes, guard guide your thoughts, guard guide your steps

What the cosmic life review indicates we do in the earthly realm: (1) justify; (2) purify; (3) sanctify

Does “what does it take to be fulfilled?” = “what does it take to be justified, purified, sanctified?”?




Proposal: our prime directive as a species is finding the balance

  • finding the balance between soul (being) and spirit (becoming)
  • finding the balance between being perfectly full and becoming perfectly filled
  • finding the balance between living soulfully (truly, deeply) and living spiritually (wisely, freely)




(A context for living life to the fullest)

proposal to universalize human need:

need 1: “a safe place to eat and sleep”
need 2: “a way to satisfy all my needs”
need 3: “someone to love and cherish”
need 4: “a healthy, vital outlook on life”

a vital distinction to observe in daily life:
satisfaction of need v. fulfillment of desire

the body is but a vessel for soul,
serving to contain all that the soul needs;
the body is but a vehicle for spirit,
serving to convey all that the spirit desires;

how might body serve to contain and convey
both soul and spirit as vessel and vehicle?

soul spirit

unity harmony
peace bliss
love joy
being becoming
loving caring
intimacy ecstasy
quality vitality
encounter experience
sacred divine
promise possibility
realization evolution
truth wisdom
responsibility freedom
depth height
inward outward
descend ascend
contemplation evaluation
involvement engagement
satisfaction fulfillment
cultivation celebration
dwelling peacefully flowing blissfully
heart of soul soul of spirit
contains conveys
accepts expects
let it be make it so
receptive assertive
attuned to what is required aligned with what is desired
dignity integrity
awakening enlightenment
being alive being alive




(A practice for living life to the fullest)


exploring …

the ways and means by which I can be centred in love
the ways and means by which I can follow (or manifest!) a path with heart
the ways and means by which I can be love truly and wisely

if the first pointer serves to expose the truth of who and what I am,
and if the second serves to reveal the meaning, purpose, and direction of my life,
then the third serves to realize a dynamic balance between my soul and spirit


the three deep, dark fears of spiritual beings in human form

1) a fear of letting go during sexual orgasm (the sexual fear)
2) a fear of losing control, of losing one’s mind (the political fear)
3) a fear of dying in pain, in anguish, in misery (the religious fear)

dysfunctional, maladaptive, unsustainable ways to maintain personal control
(here presented as pairs: a passive matter of soul, an active matter of spirit)












when life gives you lemons, turn them into lemonade ~ a popular proverb

how people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours ~ wayne dyer




(a global perspective: why is humanity failing to fulfill its true potential?)

weaving a terrestrial narrative that aligns with a cosmic perspective, including historical, interdimensional, extraterrestrial, conspiratorial, and eschatological elements, is an exhaustive process

such a terrestrial narrative would have us explore and expose the causes and consequences of two widespread (and related) social phenomena: cynical detachment and egocentric entitlement

the story of Howard Storm: how a visit to The Other Side cured his soul and spirit of cynical detachment and egocentric entitlement, transmuting his contempt for humanity into compassion and compersion

If darkness is your problem, talking about darkness won’t help.
If darkness is your problem, nothing can be done about darkness directly.
You cannot throw it out, you cannot push it out, you cannot switch it off.
Darkness is an absence. Nothing can be done about it directly.
If you have to do anything, you have to do something with the light, not with darkness.

~ Osho (Fear: Understanding and Accepting the Insecurities of Life, p. 136)




1. “I just can’t stand it anymore … why go on?”

2. “Wrong body, wrong family, wrong planet … why?”

3. “Why am I making such a mess of my life?”

4. “What does it really take to be (become) fulfilled in this life?”

5. Soul: “a sound approach to being perfect: possible?”

6. Spirit: “a sane approach to becoming perfect: desirable?”

7. The ultimate in truth, love, and power: dare we ask?


Study Notes


  • incorporate the use of symbols with these elements: sphere (soul), spiral (spirit), pyramid
  • presence and pretense: best to view them as complementary, rather than as mutually exclusive?
  • follow these elements of perspective: form, structure, substance, orientation, appearance
  • the devil challenge (problem, difficulty, obstacle, inadequacy, struggle, conflict) is in the details
  • the privileged among us: a little too preoccupied with celebrity, technology, personality, positivity?
  • extroverts and introverts: “living on the surface” and “living from the depths with presence”
  • the cosmic life review: a representation of the ultimate in personal fulfillment for a life lived?


Index of Posts

my index of recovery and discovery

ultimate perspective: where I introduce my intent to explore the ultimate in fulfillment

ultimate fulfillment 1: where I make it known who might benefit from this exploration
ultimate fulfillment 2: where I introduce the panoramic life review (Cosmic Life Review)
ultimate fulfillment 3: where I question the importance of love as fundamental to fulfillment
ultimate fulfillment 4: where I question the centrality of learning and loving (and their aims)
ultimate fulfillment 5: where I distinguish “things I make happen” from “things that happen”

ultimate fulfillment 5: where I introduce my understanding of levels of density (1D to 9D)
ultimate fulfillment 6: where I share my responses to three basic questions about love
ultimate fulfillment 7: where I realize that we are not here merely to love for love’s sake
ultimate fulfillment 8: where I share my declaration of a perfecting ideal for enlightenment
ultimate fulfillment 9: where I introduce the distinction between presence and pretense
ultimate fulfillment 10*: where I expose pretense in light of this presumptive belief: “I am God”

ultimate fulfillment 11*: where I explore three deep, dark fears in light of two kinds of mastery
ultimate fulfillment 12: where I consider the centrality of losing control and the fear it generates
ultimate fulfillment 13*: where I examine in depth “what is in the nature of a soul and spirit?”
ultimate fulfillment 14: where I introduce a key distinction between No Self and True Self
ultimate fulfillment 15*: where I share the most important insight I’ve ever had (on love and care)

ultimate fulfillment 16: where I introduce the five facets of a True Self, of a Self as Art
ultimate fulfillment 17*: where I begin the task of building an energetic structure for a True Self
ultimate fulfillment 18*: where I add context to the True Self with the five paradigms of control
ultimate fulfillment 19: where I add context to a True Self with divine guidance and layers of reality
ultimate fulfillment 20*: where I introduce a cosmic field of play for the ego in relation to a True Self

ultimate fulfillment 21: where I announce completion of a drafted perspective on birth, life, death
ultimate fulfillment 22: where I give readers a taste of how to interpret the cosmic field of play
ultimate fulfillment 23*: where I give the ego its due in the context of letting it be and making it so
ultimate fulfillment 24*: where I elaborate on the meaning and purpose of the cosmic field of play
ultimate fulfillment 25: where I describe the Essence of Presence behind the cosmic field of play

ultimate fulfillment 26*: where I offer a context for exploring in depth the cosmic field of play

* my favorite and, in my view, most significant posts so far



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