Your Ultimate Guide

by Christopher Lovejoy on April 3, 2011

At one time, I thought I knew what it took to find and follow a path that would have me flourish in my life and fulfill the promise of my life with a sense of possibility.

What I’ve learned since then is that those who are really and truly free to choose which way to go at any given moment have no well-worn paths to find or follow.

Instead, they stay present to their experience, as it comes up, and they follow their bliss, moment by moment, leaving a trail of fulfillment for others to find and follow.

But as I leave behind my own trail of fulfillment, would I have you find and follow it?

No, I would have you leave behind your own trail.

In those rare moments when you look back at your path, I want you to feel satisfied with the result. I want you to feel fulfilled by the outcome. I want you to know firsthand that you flourished.

In your own way, at your own pace, for your own sake.

But if a path of fulfillment cannot be defined with certainty before we take it, one that leads inexorably and inevitably to a smooth, sweet continuity of fulfillment, what recourse do we have?

Today, the world is changing and changing fast.

Many people have given up on having a certain future – and for good reason.

We might be tempted to look into the past and follow the examples of those who left behind their own trails of fulfillment, but what might have been fulfilling then, for them, might not be so fulfilling now.

A principled approach to fulfillment, with a liberating focus on structure, seems necessary. The scary alternative – no principles, no focus, no structure – is an invitation to chaos and confusion.

Wouldn’t you rather stay loyal to a few key principles, ideas, and structures in your life, if that meant having a satisfying, balanced, and fulfilling experience of life most if not all of the time?

In my previous post, Unity and Harmony, I explored what a path of personal fulfillment in harmony with who you really are might look like in universal terms.

In this post, the third in a three-part series of posts, I switch my focus to what it means to serve as your guide in harmony with who you really are. In my previous post, I began to lay a foundation for walking a fulfilling path and I dropped all kinds of hints about what this might look like in theory.

So what might this path look or sound or feel like in actual practice?

Principles, Symbols, and Structures

I’ll start with two fundamental principles and five basic symbols and structures. I touched on them briefly in my previous post, but here, I’ll be elaborating.

I didn’t say much about the holy cross in Unity and Harmony, simply because it would have taken a lot of explanation and I had neither the time nor the inclination to elaborate.

The holy cross is associated, in the hearts and minds of many, with the ultimate sacrifice.

They would do well, however, to understand and appreciate and realize what the symbol of the holy cross really and truly represents. The fact that it was associated with sacrifice over 2,000 years ago doesn’t mean that it’s a symbol of sacrifice. It actually represents something quite different.

Another aspect of the holy cross is that it cannot be viewed in isolation.

Seen in its fullest context, the cross is best viewed as one symbol in a composite of symbols – the cross, the circle, and the tao – all of them integrated seamlessly into a whole.

absolute perfectionThe cross is wholly integrated, or made holy, by virtue of this seamless integration.

Viewed in isolation, the cross is just another cross. As part of an integrated whole, however, the cross contributes to the expression of absolute perfection.

A kosmic backdrop is required to fully appreciate the nature of this absolute perfection.

After reading about what happens during a near-death experience, after reading about what happens during a hypnotic regression into a past life, and after reading about what happens when someone is guided into a superconscious state to a life between lives, I have a sense of your destiny as a soul.

I have a sense of who and what you are, where you came from, and where you’re headed. And believe me, it’s nothing like anything you’ll ever be able to imagine from reading a parochial religious text.

This is why I subscribe to no one religion – while being keenly interested in them all.

Whatever prejudice I might have harbored against any particular religious viewpoint has long since dissolved inside a cauldron of relentless inquiry into the ultimate nature of things.

And I don’t blame you if you’ve put on skeptical blinders. I was there once, too. A good place to be. For a while. Until one day you realize the truth that fact is often much stranger than fiction.

And yes, you can stall acceptance of fact by inquiring more deeply into what constitutes a fact, but in reality, this is just a game you play to forestall the inevitable shift in perspective that awaits you.

As I said, a kosmic backdrop is required to fully appreciate the nature of absolute perfection.

Absolute perfection is a state of pure innocence. At the moment of your creation, all dualities, on all levels, are exquisitely balanced, and only one thing exists: your potential to enter a manifest realm.

absolute perfection

The cross in this diagram represents your potential to manifest in space (vertical beam) and time (horizontal beam). The tao in this composite represents a state of exquisite balance, and the circle represents the containment of your state and your potential by absolute perfection. In this state, you’re in no position to make a decision of any kind for any reason. Why? Because you have no will to speak of. No will to behave or perform, no will to attract or improve, no will to succeed or excel.

No will to power.

And do you have a primal memory of this state?

You most certainly do.

You project this memory onto newborns – either in the process of birthing or after a birthing – and you access it every time you reach for perfection.

So who decides whether you manifest materially in space and time?

Quick answer: it’s not you.

It’s not you because you have no will to power.

The beginning of the end

Someone or something other than you bursts your bubble.

Who? What?

I don’t know.


Not necessarily.

An agent of God? A natural process?

Possibly, possibly.


I don’t know.

Could your creation be a gift? A predetermined event? A celebration of life?

Perhaps, possibly, maybe.

Do all beings have their bubbles burst?



I don’t know. Some have speculated that these innocents are not fit to manifest. Still others have speculated that they serve a special function in the ethereal realm. Are they angels? Maybe.

As you can see, there’s lots of room here for speculation and projection.

So what happens after your bubble is burst?

The new you

Doubt. Doubt happens. The experience of doubt. Your innocence is no longer pure. Your balance is no longer assured. Your perfection is no longer absolute.

Welcome to the world.

The world. Not this world.

With doubt comes self-consciousness and with self-consciousness comes an awareness of space and time, but the choice to descend into a manifest realm does not yet exist.

No informed, meaningful choice can be made if you’ve never manifested.

And so, with a little coaxing and a lot of reassurance from your soul mates and guides, you descend.


But not before you get a preview of things to come: a choice of body, a general outline of your life, a choice of parents, a cast of characters, a set of dramas and choice points, an expiry date.


And let us not forget that there are many worlds in the universe.

We have an infinite number of worlds running parallel to our own, and we have worlds that exist in dimensions not our own, and we have worlds that intersect with our own world.

What you call the universe is much vaster than you can ever imagine.

And so you descend, and the moment you enter the manifest realm is the moment you enter the realm of responsibility. You already have it within you to respond truly, wisely, and freely.

Whether you do or not is another question.


And so your soul takes up residence inside the womb of your earthly mother, and you stake a tiny claim to living, loving, learning, growing, and evolving in this manifest world – for better or worse.

Hopefully, for the better, but sometimes for the worse.


In the womb of your earthly mother, you eventually merge your soul with a growing fetus. In later years, some souls undergo hypnotic regression to recall their experiences with this merger.

You might get bored waiting for the fetus to mature, and so, on occasion, you might wander about in the meantime, always returning to your bodily residence to facilitate the merger before birth.

I’m not making this up. All of this has been documented in a clinical setting.

One can easily imagine what happens when a merger doesn’t go well, but when it does, the birth of a human being in body and soul is more often than not a cause for celebration.

If all goes well, the lusty cry of the infant signals the creation of a powerful metaphor.

the solar metaphor

At birth, the tao at the centre of the cross is consumed by the fires of creation, giving birth to the holy trinity of life – presence, promise, and possibility – represented by the solar metaphor.

The dualities are still present, but in latent form. The solar metaphor contains and expresses all that your soul and spirit needs to manifest, evolve, and flourish in this dense material world.

In your totality, you are a spark of God – a potentially limitless spark of God at the very centre of existence, situated squarely between the infinitesimally small and the infinitely large.

You contain all that God contains and you carry the potential to express all that God can express.

At the core of your being is presence, which is neither sacred nor divine: the witness, the watcher, the observer. Your presence does not and cannot define you. Your presence transcends all.

This is the place you go when you allow yourself to transcend all pain and suffering.

This is where you go to find peace.

Indeed, around the core of your presence is peace.

In solitude, in silence, in stillness, be present to your experience, and you will find your peace.

You find your peace through presence.

In peace, through presence, you find your promise. The promise of your soul.

For your own good, the promise of your soul confines and constrains your possibilities.

But your promise also allows you to attract and manifest possibilities that allow you to fulfill your promise. This can happen naturally, spontaneously, and effortlessly, but only if you let it.

Every soul has a nature, determined before its birth.

Your most prominent positive, constructive tendency might be any one of the following: to create, to explore, to educate, to communicate, to heal, to care, to protect, to perform, to advise, to guide, to build, to invent, to investigate, to assess, to manage, to direct, to lead, to harmonize, etc.

Your promise as a soul will determine what you most love to be, have, and do. And so, situated around the sphere of your promise is a much larger sphere of concern: your capacity and potential to love your encounters and experiences with another, the world, others, and yourself.

And from your encounters and experiences, you discover your purpose – your reason for being.

With purpose, you have passion, and with passion, you can attract and manifest a fiery and vibrant corona of possibilities in alignment with your promise. This is how you activate your promise fully.

The solar metaphor contains it all: presence, peace, promise, love, purpose, passion, possibility.

With love central to them all.

It’s all there for you to discover and enjoy.

That is, if you haven’t been conditioned to believe otherwise.

Have you been conditioned to believe otherwise?

If you have, and most of us have to some extent or another, there’s still hope.

pyramid of power

For starters, place yourself at the top of the pyramid, if only in your mind’s eye. If you can’t do this, or won’t do this, then I can’t help you. I won’t be able to guide you along your path of fulfillment.

I’m asking a lot, I know.

I’m asking you to imagine nothing less than your best, most enlightened version of yourself. I’m asking you to release your conditioning to be your best, most enlightened version of yourself.

I’m asking you to kiss your languishing goodbye and get on that upward spiral inside that pyramid, no matter where you might be, until stability, positivity, and flourishing become second nature.

This is where it happens, and ultimately, this is why you’re here on this planet: to be fully responsible for your experience of reality and to fully enjoy the ride up the spiral to the top of the pyramid.

Remember: purpose unifies destiny and structure determines behavior.

To get in touch with your purpose, get in touch with your presence, peace, promise, and love.

To align your behavior with your purpose, structure your passion so that you can attract and manifest possibilities that express and realize your purpose.

I don’t need to tell you what passion looks like when it has no structure. Or perhaps maybe I do?

We must realize, of course, that there’s no rush, no hurry, no pressure.

Under the weight of any kind of negativity in your life, your vision shrinks, your outlook contracts, your attention shrivels. Your corona of possibilities recede.

You mess with the positive <-> negative duality at your own risk.

If you ride the serpent, you do so at your own risk.

Positivity matters. But then, by contrast, so does negativity, but only up to a point.

A tipping point between your positive and negative emotions has been established by scientific studies that indicate a threshold between languishing and flourishing.

The positivity ratio most conducive to your personal growth, development, flourishing, and fulfillment has been identified as 3 to 1. When you pass it – that is, when your positive emotions outnumber your negative emotions by an average ratio of 3 to 1 – up you go on the spiral. And hopefully, you’ll have a pyramid – either socially or personally constructed – that supports your ascent.

Of course, a time will come in your life when none of this matters any longer.


You no longer shine as you once did. The spiral and the pyramid begin to fade into insignificance.

This time need not be a time of despair for anyone unless you know in your heart that you failed yourself in a way too profound to express. But even then.

When you die, you make a transition: you drop your earthly identity and shed your mortal coil.

alone after death

A reckoning occurs at the moment of death.

If separation from the light of love and truth has been a way of life for you, you will experience a profound moment of darkness – a kind of oblivion that will terrify.

The scope of your attention will shrink to a dot. For some, it’s even worse.

If all goes well, however, you will experience a profound joy and freedom.

You eventually enter a tunnel and return to the Light. You might linger for a time in the earthly realm, especially if you have strong attachments to it, either vainly or out of genuine concern for others.

the light at the end of the tunnel

Otherwise, you return to the Light, as described by those who have experienced near death.

If you’re a relatively young soul, you will be guided to and through the Light.

If you’re a relatively advanced soul, you will take this journey to and through the Light on your own.


Once through, a panorama of your life comes into view spontaneously, bringing up every event you ever experienced from the moment of your birth to the moment of your death.

This includes the effects that your behavior and conduct had on others, as well as the repercussions of what they in turn did to or for others. For some, this can be excruciating. For others, a joy.

The evil ones are isolated and attended to by compassionate beings.

Their energy might be reshaped. They might voluntarily agree to enter another life to pay for what they did. They might be reconstituted and lose their identities in the process.

The rest of us will be attended by a wise being who will ask us to choose those events in our lives that served us well with the expectation that we place a value on what we did.

After that, the journey of your life between your lives continues until the moment you decide to reincarnate as someone else, somewhere else, for yet another purpose.

A Little Perspective on The Journey of Souls

What are we to make of all of this?

Is this a fairy tale? A myth for our times? A delusion based on wishful thinking? An accurate accounting of life based on extensive study, reading, and inquiry?

So many of you out there are so reluctant to say what happens after we die.

You need not be.

Do the research. Investigate for yourself.

All of the indications that I’ve seen suggest that you will never die.


Your body will expire, your soul will return to its spiritual home, you will learn some more, play some more, explore some more, and then you will incarnate all over again.

Either here, on earth, or elsewhere.

If you can’t bring yourself to realize this, either because it’s too painful for you or because you’re not willing to do the research and the critical thinking required to establish these truths, then by all means, keep the blinders on, and focus on the upward spiral inside the pyramid with you at the top.

If you can bring yourself to realize these truths, then you are truly blessed. You’re in a position to view your life in a kosmic context, one that will serve you well until you make transition.

Some Practical Guidance

Your current life is but one among a few, dozens, hundreds, thousands, or millions of lives lived, here or elsewhere, so why not make good on it and live it the best way you know how?

Your personal pyramid represents your boundaries. It keeps you and your life on an even keel.

It might take the form of a schedule or software program that keeps your life organized or it might take the form of a carefully arranged space for living, working, playing, relaxing, or entertaining.

It might take the form of a set of routines that you practice over and over again, or it might be a set of principles that you apply consistently almost every day of your life.

Whatever form it takes, your personal pyramid supports you with stability and security.

Without it, you either crash and burn, your Will dissolves into apathy, or you ride the serpent to enjoy a wild kind of freedom, which puts you at risk of crashing and burning – or dissolving.

Granted, if you’ve honored a commitment to keep a personal pyramid in good shape long enough, you’ll likely be able to ride the serpent for a time, but the risk of losing it all remains.

If you have crashed and burned, or if your Will has dissolved into apathy, there’s still hope.

Find your centre: find your peace through presence to activate your promise. The Buddhists know well what they speak when they counsel, “in times of risk or stress, cultivate stillness.”

Sit with yourself in meditation or in quiet contemplation for a set period of time at a regular time each day in a sacred space, where you know you won’t be interrupted or distracted too easily.

Be consistent with this, especially when you feel like giving up.

If you feel supported by your personal pyramid, make sure you know what it looks, sounds, or feels like, and then take steps to strengthen its influence by highlighting or reinforcing its best features.

If it’s a schedule, make sure it aligns fully with your purpose.

If it’s software, explore it fully to make the most of its features.

If it’s a space, arrange it and organize it to optimize your flow.

If it’s a routine, keep it variable and flexible enough to stay motivated and inspired.

If it’s a loyalty message, tweak it until it feels utterly right to you.

Ideally, all of these pyramidal-type structures together would make a strong pyramid for helping to guide your spiral upward towards your best, most enlightened version of yourself.

As for getting on the upward spiral, read Positivity by Barbara Frederickson. While you’re at it, head over to this site and start monitoring your emotions to increase your positivity ratio.

I’ve been doing this for about a week, and already, I feel more than a little impressed by its power to keep the course of my life moving in a positive direction.

Study the solar metaphor carefully: presence, peace, promise, love, purpose, passion, possibility.

Cultivate presence, welcome peace of mind into your life, activate your promise, open your heart to love, discover your purpose, follow your passion, embrace possibility.

Rise and shine with grace on an upward spiral to the top of your pyramid.

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